Being a mom is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
Every day I am mediating arguments, washing clothes, making meals, biting my tongue so I don’t say something out of anger or frustration, trying not to injure myself while stepping over toys, meeting the quite demanding needs of four little people, attempting to maintain a somewhat clean and organized home, maintaining friendships, running errands, and trying to figure out how to raise productive citizens who love God and love people.
It’s like every day is a science experiment with constantly changing variables.
I’ll admit, most days I have no idea what I’m doing, but thankfully my kids haven’t seemed to catch on.
So here’s what I’ve noticed:
It seems that other moms seem to have everything together.
The house is clean, dinner is made, children are well-behaved and obedient, everyone is dressed in matching clothes, and there still seems to be time to actually create some of the things found on Pinterest. At least according to blogs, Pinterest, and Facebook statuses. While this is definitely something to strive for, I’m pretty sure that I don’t know anyone who actually accomplishes all these things on a regular basis. Yet we (myself definitely included!) try to portray this perfect picture to the world. So then we end up comparing ourselves.
We share only our successes, not our struggles, and we end up thinking that every other mom is doing things better, smarter, and more efficiently than we are.
While I completely agree that sharing successes and learning from what others do well is totally valid and important and is usually how I grow as a mom, I feel that sometimes we sugar coat things because we’re afraid to expose where we fall short.
We’re afraid to be vulnerable.
We afraid to admit that our kitchen is a disaster, and our floors haven’t been mopped in weeks, and sometimes we use tv as a babysitter while we take a shower or close our eyes just for a minute.
But when we’re real, and raw, and we really share our struggles with each other, it turns out that every other mom isn’t perfect either.
We don’t have it all together, and we need to be encouraged by the fact that we are not alone in this crazy experiment called parenting.
So yes, let’s continue to share our successes and spur one another along, but let’s not forget to be raw too and admit that we don’t have it all together.
We need help, we need prayer, we need encouragement from others, and sometimes we need coffee and wine to help us through the day.
So be encouraged: you are not perfect, and you don’t need to be. And no one else is perfect either.
This week, I would encourage you to share some of your raw, real-life moments with each other.
Take pictures of the mini-disasters, parenting fails, and less than perfect moments and share them in the comments, on Facebook or Instagram. Don’t do this as a way to complain about how hard things are, or to be negative in any way; just try to be real, and raw, and remember that we are all in this together. Besides, who doesn’t find those crazy moments to be incredibly funny later!
Here, I’ll go first:
- My daughter currently has a black eye and I am not entirely sure how she got it.
- This morning I put a load of laundry in for the third time because I keep forgetting to transfer it to the dryer.
- Yesterday I got really mad and yelled at my son when he was playing in his bed instead of napping.
- Earlier this week I was so tired that when my husband came home I asked him to take over making dinner and proceeded to do a puzzle on the iPad for 45 minutes.
- I forgot to order my kids’ school yearbooks by Friday’s deadline.
Just to name a few ;o)